reading people's responses to someone's legitimate question about a poly situation and seeing all of the close-minded, brainwashed idiotic monoheteronormative vitriol people spew makes me want to punch someone.
how is it that we are taught so many ways to hate love?
I get a huge kick out of reading knee-jerk responses to anything outside of the ordinary.
My recent kick has been reading about menstrual cups online. You'd be amazed at how many women are absolutely repulsed over the idea of putting their own fingers into their vaginas, and how many men seem to weigh in heavily upon an issue that is really none of their goddamn business.
I mean, I guess that's not too terribly related to your post, but goddamn is it ever frustrating watching people struggle so hard with having their comfort zones challenged.
i know! i've had people be squicked because i use tampons without applicators (the iud and the cups supposedly may not get along or i'd totally have one).... they are smaller and more portable! they produce vastly less waste! i don't get it... why be so grossed out because i touched my vag instead of a tube of chemical-laden cardboard?
and no, i think it does relate - the body squick thing is closely related to sexual squick thing, at least in the minds of those who would seek to suppress it all.
I don't know. I weigh in pretty heavily in favour of the cups, in favour of people not getting squicked out over glops of blood and uterine lining, and over the subject not being any particular taboo. I think it is my business to be interested in the subject, and in people growing up.
I just don't want to be dissed because I don't have a uterus. I still have thoughtful opinions to contribute—on polyamory, too, but I do have one of those. :)
Well I'm sorry to offend, it was not my intention! I just read a pretty strong opinion, from a man nonetheless, that there was just something wrong about reusable menstrual products and that women ought to stick to tampons and pads.
I suppose there are plenty of men capable of forming thoughtful opinions about these sorts of things, but this guy was not one of them. He came out sounding very holier-than-thou, telling us silly women what to do with our silly menstrual blood, and what was and wasn't reasonable.
And immediately afterward posting I think of something.
People don't like to think that they might be wrong, and it may seem that, on order to accept that a differing viewpoint might be okay, they have to accept, or think about, the possibility that their viewpoint might be wrong.
It's kind of an issue with believing that there is one, unqualified "right", and anything else must be wrong.
Lol.. I also think people think of something like a resuable tampon, when really cups are non-porous and can be washed and boiled and such... like a surgeon's scalpel touches a lot of blood, and is reused, but no one goes "ewwww" at that.
Ugh, I read that. What rubbish. Even if you don't approve of a lifestyle, wouldn't you offer some kind of, I dunno, advice? Being an advice columnist and all? Instead of just using your column to show that you're a narrow minded asshole bigot?
sadly, or maybe even as a good thing. what people "hate" isn't love. it's difference. they don't hate homosexuals because they have buttsex. they hate homosexuals because they are "different from the majority". they don't hate poly-anything. they are scared of polyanything because it is "different" from what they are used to. and they don't hate BDSM either. they are scared of it because it's different.
though I will never debate whether or not they are assholes.
Yeah, I saw that too. Way to NOT dispense any advice and instead go on one of her characteristic "anti-" rants. When is she going to realize that's not her job? I kept reading through the comments to find just one person who would take everyone to task for the crap they were spewing and just ultimately had to give up.
Yeah, I was disappointed by most of the comments - even the people who were somewhat poly-tolerant qualified it by saying it should be hidden from children. WTF? A healthy loving long-term committed relationship should be hidden from kids just because it's not in the realm of mono-heteronormative? Ugh.
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My recent kick has been reading about menstrual cups online. You'd be amazed at how many women are absolutely repulsed over the idea of putting their own fingers into their vaginas, and how many men seem to weigh in heavily upon an issue that is really none of their goddamn business.
I mean, I guess that's not too terribly related to your post, but goddamn is it ever frustrating watching people struggle so hard with having their comfort zones challenged.
and no, i think it does relate - the body squick thing is closely related to sexual squick thing, at least in the minds of those who would seek to suppress it all.
I just don't want to be dissed because I don't have a uterus. I still have thoughtful opinions to contribute—on polyamory, too, but I do have one of those. :)
I suppose there are plenty of men capable of forming thoughtful opinions about these sorts of things, but this guy was not one of them. He came out sounding very holier-than-thou, telling us silly women what to do with our silly menstrual blood, and what was and wasn't reasonable.
I wish I could find this link, ha ha.
Alas, I have nothing to add to the discussion of polyamory and the hate of difference.
People don't like to think that they might be wrong, and it may seem that, on order to accept that a differing viewpoint might be okay, they have to accept, or think about, the possibility that their viewpoint might be wrong.
It's kind of an issue with believing that there is one, unqualified "right", and anything else must be wrong.
though I will never debate whether or not they are assholes.
I kept reading through the comments to find just one person who would take everyone to task for the crap they were spewing and just ultimately had to give up.